Mantra for Monday no. 79

A comfort zone is exactly that. A cocoon, a warm fuzzy blanket where nothing unexpected happens and everything goes to plan. There is nothing inherently wrong in enjoying these moments...in fact it could be argued you should enjoy and appreciate their simplicity and embrace them for what they are.

BUT

Also see beyond, the thoughts, feelings and fears that tickle away at the corners of you mind...

What if?

Life is a continual exploration both physical and mental, from the crazy moment we emerge from the warm bubble of our cocoon into the reality of the universe. We are born to live and grow....true life and true growth comes from pushing those boundaries, from taking a tentative step, through embracing and expanding our comfort zone and ultimately enriching our life and the lives of those within it.

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 78

Success and failure are not mutually exclusive… You can't have one without the other. 

It is the same with happiness and sadness in life... To fully appreciate embrace, appreciate and encompass happiness you need to have experienced sadness. Life without its extremes would be no life at all.

The quote above came from Bounce, a book I was given as a present a couple of years ago as I began along this mindful journey. It holds a lot of truths for me since my own biggest downfall is the expectation of being to run before I can walk. I know this is crazy, maybe even arrogant to think that should be the case ...but my irrational mind often runs away with itself before I am able to to catch up and give it a good talking to. 

I am getting better at 'failing', I am happy to accept failure that opens new doors and direction for investigation, but the hardest sense of 'failure' is when that doorway is not immediately obvious and you don't know how to move forward. Take a step back and let the possibilities present themselves- that's the part I still need to work at!

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 77

Last week when I felt life was getting a little crazy and things felt a little uncontrolled and overwhelming... I needed a sense of grounding so I wrote myself a set of simple rules for 'daily positivity'. Some might sound cliched but for me they are brief and meaningful and allow me time to stop, think and create a more realistic sense of perspective. (The tea quote was just a nice little line I saw and reminded me of my thoughts).

• start every day off with a smile from within
• think of one think to give thanks for last thing at night
• take apple cider vinegar each morning (I've just starting this habit as a trial)
• close you eyes and truly appreciate the first few sips of each cup of tea throughout the day
• feeling down? Do 5 minutes of any form of physical exercise
• boredom or nervous hunger? pour a mug of tea and then see how you feel.

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 76

This is so very true to me and something that I come up against time and time again that stalls my action.

I remember a few years back how I wouldn't join the ladies squash club because I didn't think I was good enough at playing squash...yet all the time knowing that a squash club was exactly the place that you go to learn to be better. The irony is crazy yet I still stalled on joining for a good few months.

This is so closely related to the idea of the 'perfect moment' or 'when i'm good enough' and my drive to be as good as can be in all aspects of my life, as positive as that may seem often serves to prevent me from starting at all. 

mabtStarting means being open to failure and the potential manifestation of weakness...yet ultimately failure and weakness is the only true path to growth and strength.

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 75

I. DID. IT!!   I completed my Tough Mudder...... smiling faces all round :-)

What surprises me most was that I'm not too sore afterwards...winner!  Ok, well my knees were pretty painful yesterday and I wrapped packs of peas round them for a few hours, but that was expected since I am prone to pain in my knees and there was an awful lot of trail running!! But where is the muscle soreness?...nowhere to be seen!

I'm so glad I achieved it. For me the mental challenge was the biggest feat I had to overcome, swathes of self doubt crept in right up until the day itself. In terms of fitness I was more than ready (most apparent in hindsight which has given me a big confidence boost) and if I'm honest I didn't find too many of the obstacles as physically challenging as I was anticipating....see how much I over analyse and big things up to epic proportions in my mind!!

Anyway, for giggles, here is a short video shot of me trying to climb 'Everest' the slippery half pipe wall...bear in mind I had just run 12 miles and 20 obstacles when this was shot... see the gritted teeth...then the splat....oh so so close ;-)

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 74

This weeks Mantra is a direct extract from Leo Babauta's recently published 'Little Book of Contentment' (Freely downloadable from Zen Habits). My search for 'contentment' is a continuous learning curve and this little book speaks many simple truths. Upon reading this book, my Mantra is one of the key concepts that I took away to work with, and one which I struggle with most.

"Instead of internalizing failure as an indicator that we are not trustworthy or not sufficient, we need to learn that failure is just an external event. Sure, we were involved with that event, but it’s like throwing a ball toward a hoop — if we miss, does that mean we are horrible people? No, it just means we need to adjust the way we throw the ball. Perhaps move closer. Maybe throw underhand if that’s more successful. Get a ladder. Make the hoop bigger. Find someone to help. There are no rules in this game — we can figure out ways to make ourselves succeed. Failure is simply an indicator that something in our method needs to be changed. "

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 73

I first came across this quote by ‘ultra-marathon man’ David Goggins on Joel Runyon’s Blog Of Impossible Things. It spoke to me at the time, but I noted down the words and then duly filed them away. To be forgotten.

It was only when I was sifting through my ‘M4M’ file notes yesterday killing some time yesterday morning  whilst I waited to go to the beach for my cold sea swim (Tough Mudder preparation) that these words caught my eye once again.

So true in life, both in mental and physical tasks that may test you to the core.  Here is a further paragraph as extracted from David’s interview:

“In a race, you hit several walls. Every time you hit a wall, it’s a big deciding factor in that race, or in life, if you’re not running. You have a big decision to make.  You can either stop at that wall and go parallel left or parallel right. You are looking for that door.  When you get to that door you have another decision to make.  Should I open it or should I keep it closed.  If you keep it closed you made the decision to quit.  If you open that door you made the decision  to carry on, to continue on your journey or mission, whatever you’re on.  I always open that door!  Once you open that door, and you go through it, your mind resets and it gives you a few more miles.”

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 72

It's now less than three weeks until my Tough Mudder Challenge.... do I feel ready? Will I ever feel ready?

Tough Mudder is a mental and physical challenge and the high walls themselves are the purest manifestation of that. It's mental grit and teamwork that see you through such challenges both on through that course in the course of life.

But all challenges in life begin with a willingness to take them on. All walls, no matter how high can be overcome when there is will.

When there is a will, there is always a way. It really depends how much you want it?

I say...Bring it on!

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 71

I. Need. To. Slow. Down.

This past weekend was a stark testament to that fact. This past weekend was my birthday. It wasn’t a crazy affair with mad drunken parties or anything of that nature. I had some simple plans with friends and therefore plenty of time to spend ‘relaxing’ before and after...yet somehow that simply didn’t happen at all. Not one little bit.

To be frank, I am really frustrated with myself. I know I am pretty bad at taking time out, but I always thought I had it under control; that I could do if I wanted to but just didn’t feel the need.

Huge reality check! I was not able to relax on the two days I had specifically put aside to do so, and on the days when I probably needed it most.

This was how yesterday should have gone:

• Wake up without alarm
• Spend morning leisurely having a simple breakfast from one of my tried and tested quick and easy favourites
• Read some books/magazines/go for a walk- anything I fancied
• Have a shower/bath with nice pamper products
• Meet friends at 1pm for lunch at a Thai restaurant
• Get home early evening, chill out with my mum, have a long soak in the bath.
• Snuggle up in bed nice and early with a book or my journal to write some reflective thoughts.
• Feel refreshed waking up early for work the next morning

This is what actually happened:

• Wake up without alarm
• Immediately feel stressed because I woke up an hour later than usual and I had a lot to do before going out
• Spent a couple of hours doing some architecture work for a client that I hadn’t been able to finish on Friday evening as I was a too tired (and it needed to be completed for Monday)
• Realised I’d never got round to making the ‘cake’ I had planned to blog for my birthday with the feeling that ‘if I didn’t do it now it would be too late’. So I spent an hour or so preparing and photographing that (it did look and taste good though!)
• Realised it was 12:30pm already and I still had all my getting ready to do
• Showered and dressed in the space of 20 minutes so that I could be ready (almost) on time (as it happened my friend arrived 15 mins late to pick me up so I had 5 minutes to sit outside and catch my breath as I waited.
• Met friends and had a really lovely afternoon
• Got home at about 6pm to find an email my from the client needing minor changes to drawings.
• Made changes.
• Made mistake of looking at social media and got sucked in.
• Got to bed at 11:30pm feeling frustrated that I hadn’t found a moment to relax.
• Wrote down a few hurried thoughts with a mission statement to learn to relax this year!
• Got to bed at 12am with a 5am start in the morning.

I need to slow down. I need to simplify. It needs to start now.

More posts to come on this topic I feel. Feel free to chime in with your thoughts and advice...all very welcome...I obviously could do with it!

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 70

I have a birthday on the horizon. It’s a big one, a significant milestone in the path of my life. It will undoubtedly bring with it the sense of questioning and self-reflection.

We are all susceptible at times for taking things for granted, for walking through life looking but not seeing. I know that I can be notoriously bad at rushing around with little appreciation for my surroundings and my ‘scenery’, yet on the flip side sometimes the clouds in the sky or the rain on the window can captivate me and leave me spellbound and speechless. I know how to experience this sense of gratitude I just need to work on summoning and maintaining that mindset everyday, particularly in times of stress and rush. I guess it's actually pretty simple....slow down. Everything else will fall into place exactly as it should.

Slowing down instills gratitude, and is the foundation to enjoyment and our sense of purpose. It requires no effort, takes up no space, needs no tools, and acts on no previous experience. We all have a choice...a choice to slow down and be grateful.

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 69

It’s easy to get stuck in a rut and to play it safe when it comes to creativity and testing out ideas and experiences.  We are so focussed on following through with a plan that we become stubborn and determined to overcome any obstacles that may stand in our way...even to our detriment of seeing other opportunities that may be better suited to success.

Create dreams and goals, make plans and build strategies. Begin with plan A, it’s your starting point that set’s you on the road to achievement... BUT be open to change, to failure, to growth, to learning, to life changing experiences and most of all to the remainder of the alphabet. 

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 68

I know I can be a procrastinator, putting of the challenging tasks, hesitating over decisions and trying to constantly balance risks against outcomes. I am as bad as everyone else when it comes to playing it safe and often quite literally 'taking it's picture'. 

But that’s not life as it could be.

Immerse yourself. Body and spirit. Commit to the project in hand and go all out or not at all.

Backing off is like sitting on the fence, it’s like dipping a toe in the water...a constant ‘maybe’ and ‘one day’ Remember that one day never actually comes. Life should be lived right here, right now, full and in completeness not a glance from the safety net of the sidelines.

Life is scary, life is unknown. Life makes you smile, cry and feel deeply. And for all those who choose to let go and immerse themselves, that is what makes life worth living.

What is a Mantra for Monday?

Mantra for Monday no. 67

By definition a challenge is both a physical and mental disposition. It can only surface at the point at which you doubt whether you can reach the goal. Any easier and it would simply be par for the course, part of daily routine, non descript and non committal....now where is the real benefit in that?

Those who are ‘settled’ ‘and ‘comfortable’ may not feel the need for change or the need for challenge. Fine, go ahead and be that way. Just make sure you don’t regret not pushing that little bit harder in months and years to come.

Life's challenges help you discover who you really are.  Life offers you all the tools to be the very best you can in all ways imaginable, for me I simply cannot condone dismissing that opportunity. Failure is never defeat until the point at which you give up.

Challenge is a game... small things, big things, asking questions, seeking answers. Life is a journey of pathways, opportunities and experiences and rising to the ‘challenge’ enriches the ride.

What is a Mantra for Monday?